"When I got my first cat, it changed me. There is something about holding a cat that makes your anger melt away. And if someone does something that upsets me—I have to remember my cat. I can’t keep my cat if I get into trouble.”
"I asked if Major Cabanaw had concerns for the safety of the cats. “Of course, we always want to ensure the safety of the cats, and the staff is great about keeping an eye out for them. But mostly, it’s the offenders keeping them safe. I have never once seen an offender kill his own cat. We screen them to be sure they have no history of animal abuse. But I’ll tell you this, there was a guy killed in here because he had spit soda pop onto someone else’s cat.”"
Cats now control the prisons. They now have an army.
i lost my kitty, buddy, last night, so stuff like this makes me feel simultaneously happy and sad
i find my cosmic insignificance reassuring
the stars don’t fucking care who i am or what i do
i owe the universe nothing
i exist on my own terms
#when existentialism becomes comforting rather than horrifying
do you think obama attends high school reuinions and is like “oh hey jimmy. remember when you would shove me into the lockers in the 10th grade? yeah well guess what. fuck you im the president”
my uncle went to elementary school with Obama and he told us that a bunch of kids did once lock him in a lockerthe truth is out obama